A Brief Chat from the Backyard © 2018 Rhonda Freeman, PhD In this video I discuss how the reward system is involved in fueling the sensations, emotions, thoughts, and cravings many will have regarding the narcissist. The trauma bond ignites many different regions of the brain and can cause us to feel terribly out of […]
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Affective Resonance: I Don’t Feel You & You Can’t Feel Me | Narcissists & Psychopaths
(c) 2018 All Rights Reserved | Rhonda Freeman, PhD Affective resonance is basically the unspoken social connection and interaction that takes place between brains. It comes from the deepest regions of the brain reaching out to the deepest regions of the other beings brain. It covers a large range of emotional states — for example, empathy […]
Three Personality Traits That Increase Vulnerability to Unhealthy or Toxic Partners
Does it feel like you attract the same kind of partner again and again? One that does not add value to your life or enhance your personal growth, but rather one that leads you straight to the therapists’ office. Let’s look at certain personality characteristics that may attract unsavory characters into your life. Survivors of […]
Is Narcissistic Personality Disorder an Illness?
(c) 2018 Rhonda Freeman, PhD What a great question! Is narcissistic personality disorder an illness or a choice? Here is my opinion. Narcissistic personality disorder is an illness. A mental illness. It is a disorder. “A choice” you mention? This is where it gets trickier. Yes, they do fully understand right from wrong; they […]
Can I make it work if I use my Cluster B Education? | Staying with the Narcissist or Psychopath
Can I make this work? © 2018 Rhonda Freeman, PhD Sometimes I hear from website visitors that they want to stay; and for those who have someone low on the pathological narcissism spectrum, I understand why that would be tempting. They tell me that they want tips that will allow them to ‘manage’ their […]
Retaliation & Revenge | Aftermath of Narcissistic & Psychopathic Abuse
Anger in the Aftermath of a Narcissistic Relationship (c) All Rights Reserved The aftermath of narcissistic abuse will often include feelings of anger. Angry that they are disordered; angry that they had the arrogance/audacity/ hatred to abuse you; angry that they possibly wasted years of your life; angry that you need to heal simply for loving […]
What about you? Self-Care After the Narcissistic or Psychopathic Relationship
Guilt and Shame | A message to survivors ‘new’ to the aftermath (c) 2018 Rhonda Freeman, PhD When you’re fresh out of an abusive relationship with a narcissist or psychopath your mind can feel on fire with conflicting thoughts and intense emotions. You might feel angry with your abuser; you might feel angry with yourself. […]
Why ‘No Contact,’ Intentional Detachment, & Support Help the Trauma Bond
‘No Contact,’ Detachment, & Support © 2017 Rhonda Freeman, PhD | All Rights Reserved The combination of (non-professional) approaches I have found to be most helpful for survivors to implement in the aftermath of narcissistic and psychopathic abuse are No Contact Detachment Support Let’s look at why. Feeling deeply attached to a partner that has turned […]
Neuroscience Behind Idealize, Devalue, and Discard
Neuroscience Behind Idealize, Devalue, and Discard [My Two Phase Theory] © 2017 NeuroInstincts | All Rights Reserved [Reviewed 2018] Individuals with narcissistic personality disorder and psychopathy tend to rotate through partners in a relatively predictable manner. The well-known idealize, devalue, and discard cycle has been reported by many victims of abuse. (The video below illustrates […]
Video: The Trauma Bond and Mean, Hateful Partners
The Trauma Bond The Hook of Narcissists, Psychopaths, & Abusers © 2016 Rhonda Freeman, PhD | All Rights Reserved [Reviewed 2018] Answers to the following scenarios can be explained, at least in part, by the trauma bond. Why do I feel a connection to someone who is awful to me? I see that she lacks […]
He Loves Me, He Loves Me Not – Psychopathy, Narcissistic Personality, and Safe, Loving Relationships
He Loves Me, He Loves Me Not – Psychopathy, Narcissistic Personality, and Safe, Loving Relationships © 2016 NeuroInstincts | All Rights Reserved No Unauthorized Reproduction Permitted in any form One of the most disheartening realities I have encountered as a personality educator is victim shaming and blaming. When you are a survivor or someone who […]
Narcissistic & Psychopathic Relationships – Blindsiding and Discarding
The Disrespectful, Hateful, Flippant Breakup © 2016 Rhonda Freeman, PhD | All Rights Reserved Control, rudeness, and disdain will often replace the red hot, all-consuming attraction (‘love’) they have for their partners. This is one of many hallmarks of a narcissistic and psychopathic relationship. In relationships with individuals with psychopathy and narcissism, no one is more important than they […]
Healing After Trauma – Narcissistic & Psychopathic Abuse
Getting through the Trauma After Narcissistic & Psychopathic Abuse © 2016 Rhonda Freeman, PhD | All Rights Reserved Cruelty, psychological games, and danger are never love. This is why the breakup period or aftermath with abusers often require a recovery process. Healing. It is not a matter of a broken heart, but a broken spirit; […]
Relationship Cycle of Individuals with Psychopathy and Narcissistic Personality Disorder – Idealize, Devalue, Discard
A Common Relationship Cycle of Individuals with Psychopathy and Narcissistic Personality Disorder (c) 2016 Neuroinstincts | All Rights Reserved Individuals with narcissistic personality disorder and psychopathy tend to rotate through partners in a relatively predictable manner. The well-known idealize, devalue, and discard cycle has been reported by many abuse victims. The beginning of these relationships are usually […]
Craving Your Ex? Addicted to a Dangerous Partner
Craving Your Ex? When You’re Addicted to a Dangerous Partner © 2015 NeuroInstincts | All Rights Reserved No Unauthorized Reproduction Permitted in any form Did you know it’s normal for our brain to have an addicted feeling toward the people we love? Yes! It is nature’s way of ensuring we mate and also properly care for […]
Are You Dating a Psychopath? | 16 Warning Signs of Psychopathic Traits
Signs you could be dating a psychopath © 2015 Rhonda Freeman, PhD Could you be dating a psychopath? In the beginning it can be nearly impossible to tell. However, as time wears on, there are often many red flags and signs of psychopathy. The psychopathic partner introduces elements to an intimate relationship that should never […]
Grooming | New Romantic Partnerships with Manipulators
Grooming | New Romantic Partnerships with Manipulators © 2013 Rhonda Freeman, PhD [Reviewed 2018] For many individuals with severe personality disturbances there is an additional layer to their excitement and addiction in the beginning stage of their relationships – Grooming. Unlike the excitement they have for their new target, the grooming component of their relationships is intentional. It is tailored to […]
Abuse and Love | What kind of relationship is this?
© 2013 Rhonda Freeman, PhD| All Rights Reserved Abuse and love are combinations you’ll never find in healthy relationships. You know this, however if your partner was a narcissist or psychopath, they likely tried to make you feel at fault for not accepting their treatment as normal. Their gaslighting, manipulation, taunting, secrecy, lying, cheating, selfishness, were […]
Grooming, Manipulation, and Love Bombing
© 2013 Rhonda Freeman, PhD | All Rights Reserved When pathologically abusive individuals get access to a new target they often shift into an intensely addictive state. That being said, most human beings get a ‘lover’s high’ or ‘dopamine rush’ when they are with someone new. It’s normal. Our thoughts tend to get focused on our potential […]
Wanting to Educate the Narcissistic or Psychopathic Partner? Wait – Not so fast
© 2013 Rhonda Freeman, PhD | All Rights Reserved Are you thinking of confronting, educating, or ‘enlightening’ an individual with pathological narcissism or psychopathy about their disorder? Well, the chances are high that this could lead to more problems and in some cases (depending on the disordered partner) place you in a dangerous position. People with […]
Lying & Deception in Abusive Relationships
The Brain and Body as a Lie Detector? Lying and Deception in Relationships with Narcissistic or Psychopathic Partners © 2013 NeuroInstincts | All Rights Reserved Lying and deception are extremely common within psychopathic and narcissistic relationships. When individuals lack the ability to engage with others in a moral fashion, are incapable of genuine care, coupled with the […]
Manipulation and the Psychopathic / Narcissistic Relationship
Manipulation and the Psychopathic Relationship Be Smart with Your Heart © 2013 NeuroInstincts | All Rights Reserved | No Unauthorized Reproduction Permitted in any form Emotionally healthy people do not intentionally violate the rights or boundaries of others. Love is not a process of pain, obstacles, betrayal, secrecy, and disloyalty. Abuse is not a part of normal […]
When the Relationship Goal is not Love
Narcissistic Personality (c) 2013 Rhonda Freeman, PhD | All rights reserved If I were to ask you: “What is it that you want to give to your relationships?” What would you say? Would you tell me you want your partner to have experiences such as, support, understanding, comfort, and love? In the absence of pathology, […]
Manipulating your Empathy | Grooming in Narcissistic and Psychopathic Relationships
Exploiting Empathy Grooming in Narcissistic & Psychopathic Relationships © 2013 Rhonda Freeman, PhD Not all behavior in the beginning of a relationship with a psychopath or narcissist is grooming. For many, the emotional high they demonstrate is probably genuine. Just like the rest of us, they are stimulated by a new relationship and swimming in […]
